Gia's Love Languages

Since becoming Gianna's mom, I've intentionally concentrated on how to do things for her so that she will feel loved.  I based my thoughts on this topic off of Gary Chapman's book, "The 5 Love Languages," which Bobby and I have talked about periodically since we were dating.  According to the book, the five love languages are:

Physical touch
Words of Affirmation
Quality time
Acts of service
Gifts

Although we can feel a level of love from all 5 of these, there are particular ones that keep us connected to each other and make us feel appreciated and deeply loved.  My love languages are gifts and quality time, and Bobby's are words of affirmation and physical touch. 

I've tried to pay attention to what Gianna's love languages are so that she will truly feel special, safe and loved, and this is what I think I've found.  For Gia, she feels most loved through quality time and words of affirmation.  Out of these two choices, quality time is certainly the top love language.  She craves time with me and Bobby, particularly together, playing on the floor or just driving to the store.  She wants us to dance with her as we watch Sesame Street, eat cookies and milk along with her, and sit on the floor as she builds with legos or plays with her cash register.  She will say, "sit please, mama!" if I sit on the couch instead.  She brings us book after book to be read to her, just to sit beside us and spend that time together.  Although this can be a very tiring, time consuming way to show love, it's also extremely rewarding.  Since we share that love language, I think we both benefit a lot from it.

The second love language, words of affirmation, is probably a common one for toddlers, but for now it is what shows her how proud we are of her and how much we enjoy her.  I try to take Michelle Duggars advice and "purpose to smile" at Gia, even when I'm tired or it's been a tough day.  This one comes very naturally to Bobby, and he speaks very enthusiastically to her as he encourages her.  I make a conscious decision daily to praise her for cleaning up, eating her lunch, being good while having her diaper changed, and playing kindly with others.  My favorite thing to do is to tell her to look at me, and then tell her that I love her.  She always smiles at this and I think those words become engrained in her heart.

Although her love languages may change as she grows into adult-hood, for now, we concentrate on these two qualities the most so that we can cultivate a caring, close relationship with our daughter.